A recent arrest in Kerala has unravelled a large network of Wife Swapping couples in Elite Circles of Kerala. A practice which was commonly known in army circles earlier has now penetrated into high net worth societies and high pay earning youngsters in urban metros. Pubs, casual sex, incest, child abuse, illegal relationships, date rape have become common parlance in India just like in the West. Living together is an accepted practice now. Nothing really surprises the middle class Indian today since these western practices have come along with the western culture imposed through the IT revolution. Technology has brought moral decadence in society.Â
Wife swapping which was hitherto a western ritual has spread across even tier 2 cities in India especially in the tech savvy educated population who connect online through communities established for the very purpose of wife swapping. In Ladakh, years back, Wife Swapping was a accepted ritual among Brogpa tribe in Ladakh. Several Native tribes across the world have liberal sexual practices. The practice of wife swapping here has negative shades since in many of the cases,the woman has no choice whereas in tribal communities, the woman has a choice to make and the male can make love only if the female agrees.Â
In 2021, a housewife in bengaluru committed suicide after her software engineer husband was forcing her to agree to wife swapping. He wanted his wife to agree so that he could enjoy other people’s wives offering his wife in exchange. This is legally punishable since it is pushing her wife into prostitution against her own will because he wants to enjoy other people's wives. He used to beat her for refusing. She had attempted suicide thrice earlier. The couple were married for 15 years and had a 11 year old son. In most such cases, the accused is acquitted since the wife swapping issue is brought in by defence as a excuse of allegation.Â
In another case, a Bengaluru based girl was married to a software engineer led lavish western lifestyle. She sought divorce from her husband who made her drunk and sleep with his friend so that he could sleep with their wives. The couple are addicted to late night parties where families drink together and interact openly. At a resort party, both husband and wife drank heavily. The wife didn’t even remember when she slept. In the morning, the wife found her husband’s friend in their resort bedroom. When she informed her husband who came later, she was shocked to know that it was all arranged since the husband was sleeping with the wife of the person who was sleeping in her bed. The Family Court Judge while granting the divorce said that such wife swapping cultures spoil Indian society.
Sujatha Ravi Kiran had accused that she was pinned down and molested by senior navy officers while her husband just stood back and watched. Sujatha told the media that wife swapping was common in the navy circles and she was told that she had to participate in the wife swapping ritual if her husband was to retain his job. This was after she caught her husband in a compromising position with another senior officer’s wife. Sujatha is an IIT Graduate and had left a high paying job after marriage. There was earlier a complaint of wife swapping in 2011 on INS Dronacharya but the issue was buried.Â
Wife Swapping cases are rampant in India but till date, barring a few cases, most have not been pursued to its logical conclusion due to lack of evidence from women. In many cases, the accused have been acquitted and the victims accused of instability, immaturity and deliberate rabble rouser. In high profile cases, the suppression is more high as seen in Sujatha Ravi Kiran’s allegation of molestation by her navy officer husband’s seniors. She was accused of needing counseling and cases were not pursued.
So frustrated are some spouses at this unnatural practice that a wife actually bludgeoned her 46 year old husband when he tried to force her to agree to wife swapping with one of his relatives. In most cases, the male wants to have sex with others and hence offers his wife in return. The choice of wife is not considered important. This is a decadent moral practice showing declining moral values of society.Â
The current case in Kerala is not new. Earlier too, police had busted a wife swapping racket in Kerala. Technology and social media groups have made it easy for couples to build communities of interest. Kerala police said that around 5000 couples were registered in the wife swapping network. Many of them were educated while others were offering their wives for money while they wanted to enjoy other’s wives.Â
In Indian courts, there are many cases registered on wife’s allegations of attempted/forced wife swapping by husbands. Many of them have been dismissed citing lack of evidence/inability to prove the practice. In another case, a housewife committed suicide after her husband forced her to accept wife swapping or bring more dowry. In another case, the wife of one of two brothers accused both brothers for forcing the wives of the two brothers into wife swapping and torture. In another case, a wife filed for divorce after her brother in law tried to force her to agree to wife swapping so that he could enjoy her while his brother could enjoy with her Bhabhi.
Wife Swapping is as evil as incest in India yet the truth about it is as suppressed as incest is. In both cases, the victim, the female is blamed and hence the abuse remains silent. There are hundreds of cases where daughter in laws have been raped by their father in laws or brother in laws yet they never come out since the life of a single woman is more worst in Indian Male Chauvinistic Society forcing women to remain in abuse rather than speak out and be single. There is not much difference between a widow and an abused woman. Both suffer in silence the discrimination meted to them by society.Â
